In my post-cancer life I’ve had the pleasure and privilege of being involved in several great organizations, including the American Cancer Society Cancer Action Network, the Cancer Support Community of East Tennessee, the Colorectal Cancer Alliance, Fight Colorectal Cancer, Chemo Angels, and the National Coalition for Cancer Survivorship.
One group I haven’t talked a lot about is Man Up to Cancer. Our private Facebook group, The Howling Place, is an 1,800-member strong and growing online community of men from around the world who have been diagnosed with, have survived or are caregivers for someone with cancer.
Trevor Maxwell, a stage-four colorectal cancer survivor, founded MUTC to keep men from isolating and facing cancer and treatment alone.
The MUTC mascot is the wolf, thus The Howling Place. We are members of the pack. ”For the strength of the pack is the wolf, and the strength of the wolf is the pack.”
Men in The Howling Place are encouraged to “howl.”
Vent.
About cancer, treatment, side effects, impacts on our families, etc.
Offer support.
Encourage each other
Lift each other up.
Nothing wrong with co-ed support programs. I was in a co-ed support group.
There are things guys are going to share with other guys.
And, while we talk about our experiences, we don’t dispense medical advice.
But there are lots of inside jokes about pineapple on pizza.
The first day of every month is an ABC (Anything But Cancer) Day, where we share great things happening in our lives. ABC news is acceptable anytime, but especially on the first of the month.
We also remember the members of the pack who have fallen. Nearly 140 at this point. We carry their banners in their stead.
In addition to the private Facebook group, there are twice-monthly Zoom meetups, a website and a podcast.
All of these elements help tell the stories of the men in this amazing community, and they are all amazing.
While I haven’t had the opportunity to meet Trevor yet, and I know it will happen eventually, I have met several guys from the group in person.
When I travel, whether for work, pleasure or cancer advocacy, I post a message in the FB group that I’m going to be in whichever city I’ll be in and offer to meet anyone who is available.
I’m not the only one. MUTC meetups happen all the time.
Last week, I met John Falk in Chicago. John is a two-time breast cancer survivor. Yes, men get breast cancer too and John is not afraid to show off his mastectomy scars. We met at my hotel, then walked to the Magnificent Mile where we enjoyed Stan’s Donuts and then he showed me some of the more than 150 architectural treasures embedded in the base of the Chicago Tribune building.
Last month I met and hung out with Ryan Vieth, a fellow colorectal cancer survivor, when we were in Branson, Mo., for Fight CRC Ambassador training weekend. We were sort of the Gathering of Wolves West, because we were in Branson together while a large gathering of MUTC guys took place in New York state.
Earlier this year, I met Gary Bledsoe in Washington, DC, while I was in town for the NCCS. Gary is a rectal cancer survivor who, as a bonus, had a heart attack during chemotherapy. We had dinner at a Vietnamese restaurant and shared stories of being in DC for various cancer advocacy initiatives over the course of our lives.
In Richmond, I met Chris Jones, first responder who was diagnosed with colorectal cancer, and his wife. They came with Adrian Manning, a retired firefighter who is also a colorectal cancer survivor. We met at a country buffet and laughed and nodded knowingly about things only other colorectal cancer survivors know.
Adrian and I met last year while I was in Richmond. We became fast friends, and then Sarah and I met his wife Amy and their daughter Austyn when they visited Pigeon Forge last fall.
Last August, I met Joe Bullock, MUTC’s number two, and JJ Singleton, who led North Carolina’s Fight CRC Climb for a Cure. Both men were diagnosed with CRC. JJ is still in treatment, and just endured chemotherapy round 122.
My guy JJ is truly my inspiration and his face is the one in my mind when I talk to lawmakers about cancer. He has literally been through hell and keeps fucking going, which is the official MUTC mantra.
JJ held a fundraiser for Fight CRC in Waynesville, NC, last fall. Sarah and I got to hang out with JJ for a bit. We also met Pat Ryan, another CRC survivor and exceedingly talented musician.
While I haven’t met him in person, Daniel Garza, another CRC survivor, and I have had several Zoom meetings and I’ve appeared on his show a couple times. One day, I’ll hug his neck in person.
I’ve also introduced a few guys to the group, including Chris Chamblee, a prostate cancer survivor and Scottish games athlete who started Second Chance Honey Hot Sauce as a means of paying forward his gratitude for being alive.
I’ve also vicariously gotten to know guys like Michael Riehle, Tim McDonald, BJ Meador, Danny Riggs, Stephen Westphal, John Sarzoza, Michael Grayling, Steven Barker, Chris Taylor Lee Silverstein and so many others. Honestly, I hesitated to start a list because I’m sure I left someone out.
We are a pack. We are each other’s strength and support. MUTC is a very special place. I’m grateful for this fellowship.
I’m not ashamed to say I love these guys.
If you are man who is facing cancer, has survived or is a caregiver for someone with cancer, or you know a man who is, please join us at Man Up to Cancer.
You won’t regret it.
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